Ramyar’s Family Decides to Forgo Surgery, Return to Iraq Tonight
August 30, 2009 by awara

Yesterday was the very difficult day that we all hoped we would have to face with Ramyar and his family. We hoped when the medical signs showed Ramyar to be “operable” it would mean that there was a pretty clear cut way forward and that all parties would feel equally confident about embarking on that path of surgical therapy.
Instead, even though the medical signs said he was technically operable, everything else said that the surgery would be a serious fight for his life. In this case, “operable” did not mean “desirable.”
So we were left at a fork in the road with Ramyar and his family: should we press forward with what might be a surgical salvation, or should we play it safe, enjoy the next few years with Ramyar, and walk out with the full knowledge that forgoing this surgery will consign him to a deterioration in his quality of life over the next few years until he ultimately dies at age six or seven.
The most complicating factor had to do with the lack of unity among Ramyar’s family as to what should be done. Those of us closest to the decision in PLC were leaning toward not doing the surgery… as was the mother… but the father in Iraq was insisting that we all press forward.
In the end, at 8 p.m. Friday night Ramyar’s father and mother agree amongst themselves (without any input from PLC) that they wanted to forgo the surgery and enjoy these next years with Ramyar with some sort of certainty as to what they can expect.
From every perspective it was a sad day… except the perspective that sees Ramyar reunited with his father and grandparents in Iraq able to live out the next few years surrounded by people who love him.
This is the first close call like this we’ve ever had to make. Until today, every child has fit comfortably into the “operable” or “inoperable” category and parents have been confident in moving forward based on the information they had available to them.
NOTE: As an aside on financial transparency, the family’s $2,500 that they contributed to the overall cost of what would have been his surgery has covered all of the costs of their airfare, housing, food, and diagnostic testing for Ramyar. PLC has not expended any of our internationally fundraised dollars on this screening/selection process and all of the funds we had budgeted for Ramyar will be redirected to a child in the near future.
Follow 4-year-old Ramyar on Twitter: @ramyarjafar. Subscribe to Ramyar’s updates via RSS here. Follow Ramyar’s thread of longer stories (with pictures) on the PLC blog here.
Did you like this post? Get the latest news and free merchandise offers before it makes it to our blog by subscribing to our free newsletter!
| Awara Hassan Mama is a Regional Development Officer for the Preemptive Love Coalition in charge of creating local solutions to local problems in Iraq among his compatriots and for the sake of our constituents. Awara often travels abroad with PLC children to surgery and serves as a translator and a key cooperator between communities in conflict. |
Comments
One Response to “Ramyar’s Family Decides to Forgo Surgery, Return to Iraq Tonight”














Laurent Robert.